Judy Bandidt
8/4/2012 01:06:57 pm
A Grey Day in the City
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Ron Wiseman
8/4/2012 05:27:19 pm
Judy, I liked your poem quite a bit. There was much more show THAN TELL AND THAT IS SUCH A GOOD THING. Do you need the final line of this beautiful poem? Ron :)
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8/4/2012 06:05:12 pm
I think I need to revisit that whole last stanza actually. This is much shorter than the original version, and maybe I've lost something in the translation to a shorter, tighter poem. Thanks for your comment. Judy
Ron Wiseman
8/4/2012 02:21:49 pm
At Prayer
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Judith Bandidt
8/4/2012 06:21:38 pm
A quiet, pleasing poem. I wonder, though, if the title does really reflect prayer, or something akin to prayer - reflection, meditation, contemplation perhaps?
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Ron Wiseman
8/5/2012 05:56:46 pm
Judy, I have. One may spell alleluia both ways. It's a Hebrew translation thingo, I think. lol.
Ron Wiseman
8/4/2012 02:29:19 pm
London
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Judith Bandidt
8/4/2012 06:11:29 pm
In some ways I feel this is a poem in two parts. In the first half or so, you are really 'positioning' it - more than dating it - by the references to the Olympics and the Queen's jubilee. Might want to rethink that. Dickens is an era, the others are merely events.
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Ron Wiseman
8/5/2012 06:00:03 pm
Perhaps, Judy. I do think line two should have "Her" and not "its".
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Lyn
8/20/2012 02:04:31 am
Hello everyone, apologies for the tardiness, I have been on the road for several weeks. Have forgotten how to leave separate replies after each poem, so I am putting all my comments here:
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lyn
8/25/2012 07:44:45 pm
hello Poets, here is a poem for your end of August meeting:
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Judy
8/25/2012 07:50:57 pm
Lyn, this is brilliant!
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lyn
8/30/2012 02:25:01 am
hello Judy, my mother - the source of much poetry at present. I was thinking about her while watching water tumbling over rocks. Her words come out in a jumble now, but luckily she is very serene.
Ron Wiseman
9/4/2012 09:34:02 am
Lyn, this poem is imagistically capable of speaking to the human condition for any given reader. Wonderful.
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judy bandidt
8/30/2012 08:16:07 am
Yes, of course. Should have realised this. Judy
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